How to Date in High School
Happy Valentine's Day!
Relationships in high school have always been a controversial topic. Some people believe that it's okay to have relationships in high school, whereas others aren't fond of high school relationships. However, if you are one to get into a relationship, you want good advice... right?
I've always wanted to know how teachers feel about high school relationships, but I didn't know how anyone would react to their true opinions. So I asked for advice. From your teachers to you, here is the best relationship advice I've got!
Be honest. Be kind.
I met my husband in highschool (we started dating when he was a freshman and I was a sophomore and have been together ever since!). My advice would be to still make time for school, sports, and other friends you had before you met each other. Seeing each other only once or twice during the week (outside of school hours) and once a weekend is setting healthy boundaries for the relationship so that it does consume the other fun parts of your highschool years.
I think it's dangerous to take relationship advice from teachers. Except maybe Momma and Daddy Mac. They're clearly onto something.
My advice, besides waiting to get into a serious relationship until your brain fully develops (which isn't in high school), would be to date someone kind. Look at the person's character, how they treat others around them, if they have integrity, how they treat you, and if they are honest.
Pick your battles, do you part, give 100% and expect 0% in return...when you're not giving that much, it's time to either have a conversation about your feelings or simply move on. Be with someone who makes you happy and can talk through issues when you're upset with them. Know that high school relationships will be just apart of your 'story' in finding who you are as a person and who you want/need in a person/life partner. Love yourself before anyone else.
I'd be happy to [give relationship advice] with a verse from Jimmy Buffet:
"Now for the big one..
We all got ’em, we all want ’em. What do we do with ’em?
Here we go, I’ll tell ya.
She said you’ve got to do your fair share, Now cough up half the rent. I treat my body like a temple, You treat yours like a tent. But the right word at the right time – “Say, give me a little hug” – That’s the difference between lightning And a harmless lightning bug."
*Fruitcakes by Jimmy Buffet
Finally, you have to be able to take care of yourself before you can take care of some else:
"And it's all right now, learned my lesson well You see, ya can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself." - Ricky Nelson, Garden Party
When your significant other is speaking, truly listen. When you don’t like something, speak up. Communication is the only way to truly love or be loved.
1. Don't get serious with any one person in high school. Get to know many people with different personalities. Learn to understand their likes and dislikes.
2. Realize that being in a relationship is not about what you can get out of it, but rather what you can put into it. No one likes a selfish person that only cares about themselves.
3. Get to know the other person's parents and family. It is important for the parents to know you and trust you. This is an important habit to start because when the day comes that you start to think about marriage, you will be marrying into a family and it is important to have a good relationship with the in-laws.
4. A guy should ask the other person's parents for permission to date their daughter. I may be old, but I think this is very important and it will go a long way in building trust with the parents. You should also listen to your own parents and what they think about the person you are in a relationship with. If your parents do not like the other person, you should listen to their advice.
1. Love yourself first!
2. Your first, second or even third love will not likely be your last one. People's lives and goals change.
3. "Love should make you feel happy. ¡No drama, por favor!" - Ms. Llama
4. You are not "half-a-person", so don't search for your "other half". You are a "whole AWESOME person"
5. Your forever/lasting love (the one you are going to spend your life with/get married) will not likely be your first high school love/crush.
Dating relationship - make smart choices when you're together, pick somebody you have fun with that likes to have fun with each other's friends too, don't lose your friends for a bf/gf, don't stalk each other's social media!!!, remember that there's a good chance this relationship won't last forever so even though it seems like the most important thing remember that it's you by yourself that creates happiness not who you're with. ;)
Don't get into one until you're 30. Haha. Seriously... if something doesn't feel right, it isn't. Don't ignore red flags. Your gut feelings will tell you if and when something is a red flag. If someone doesn't seem to care about your feelings, he/she needs to be dropped like a hot tater. It may hurt a lot, but hanging on to something/someone who isn't right for you will hurt far worse in the long run.
My biggest piece of advice is making sure that you don't lose yourself when attaching yourself to someone else. Staying true to your values and your own identity. All too often we conform to those around us whether it be a relationship with a significant other or friends or family. Knowing your values and knowing your priorities in a relationship and communicating those to your significant other early on is so important. Oh and if your closest friends/family see you drifting from who you are and try to tell you, listen to them! They love you and want what is best for you.